Manners Matter: Ages 13 to 19

Restaurant Rules

The Right Foot

People reveal a lot about themselves by the way they behave when they dine out and how they interact with the staff at restaurants. How many relationships do you think end after the first date in a restaurant? Thoughtless or ignorant behavior can be a real turn-off. The same courtesy you use at home also applies when you eat out, although there are a few extra rules.

Civil Action

You may have eaten out on you own plenty of times already. But perhaps your experience is limited to a fast-food meal or dining out with your parents. Choose a restaurant you've never been to. Consider one that is a little nicer than usual or one with a specialty or ethnic fare you haven't tried. It's important to pick something different enough to challenge your skills. Invite your helper, a friend, or a date to join you. Before the event, do as much research as you can about the restaurant etiquette. Do you know how much to tip? Do you know how to eat a variety of tricky foods? Are you sure who should pay or how to divide a check? Don't forget to find out whether you need to make a reservation. Also, ask what a typical meal costs so you'll have enough money. Discuss the event with your helper afterward.

Extra Polish

Interview a waiter or waitress. Ask questions about difficult situations they encounter with customers. Which ones are breaches of etiquette? What are their pet peeves about dealing with the public? Did you learn anything that would make you more understanding, more polite, or more effective as a consumer?

Finishing School

Share

• Did you discover any conflicting information about etiquette in your research?
• Did you encounter any situations in the restaurant for which you were unprepared? If so, how did you react?
• What did you observe about the behavior of fellow diners that you think was good or bad?
• What rules of food etiquette make sense to you? Which ones seem arbitrary? Can you speculate on the origin of a given custom?

Process

• If you encountered a situation you didn't expect, how did you decide the most tactful way to handle it?
• How is dining out different than eating at home?
• What would you do if you were in a restaurant and lacked enough money to pay the bill?
• What should you do if you are overcharged? What should you do if you are undercharged?

Generalize

• Why is it important to use good manners around strangers?
• What other times have you had to contemplate proper public etiquette?

Apply

• How could you apply what you learned to dating relationships or work-related events in the future?